Monday, June 23, 2014

Worries.

It's a given. Being a parent = worrying. About food. About milestones. About danger. About the future.

But somehow I think we all think we are the only ones who struggle! I guess struggles feel the most isolating. (And we all know about the evil social media perfection syndrome. The hard stuff doesn't get as many FB posts. Probably because it's not usually possible to take a picture of your kid while they are melting down before bedtime. And allergies and illnesses and delays are hard to quantify.)

I do think there is a lot of honesty out in the internet though. I think I've been very honest, although I still worry sometimes when I post too many "perfectiony" posts that I'm leaving out the day to day reality.

So let's be real today. 



My biggest parenting struggles:

Meals - Constant pressure to keep it high calories but not constipating, to get the iron absorbed without calcium intake, to try to serve healthy foods, organic foods etc.

Bedtime - I've still got a great sleeper, but bedtime is getting longer and longer with more and more tears. Every time I succumb I feel like I have ruined bedtime for the rest of eternity. Ugh.

(I'm not going to put milestones on my list because although I think about it often and it's uncomfortable being on the low end of the spectrum, I just know that it'll allbr okay and that D is developing well.)

And I'm not even focusing on my constant struggle to try to cook, to try to keep the house somewhat clean, to get te laundry done, to get the laundry out away. I'm the opposite of a born home-maker and the struggle is REAL!

So what are your biggest parenting stressors. What makes you feel like you are the only one who understands?

Let's do some therapy!

12 comments:

  1. My biggest parenting stressor is food. I just can't seem to get her to eat a "balanced" meal. Particularly on work days. This is the one area where I feel like a failure. I try to brush it off but it does get to me.

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  2. Love it. Just posted a response on my blog

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  3. Routine is a big stress right now. My son is very much a fan of a consistent routine, especially when it comes to sleep/naps and sometimes eating. Unfortunately, the reality of our situation is that he is cared for on differing days by differing people (a private, in-home daycare 1-2 days per week, my in-laws maybe once a week, my husband and I the rest of the time). It's tough to get everyone on the same page and consistently doing the same routine with him, and I get frustrated easily when he is "off" after being with, say, my in-laws all day. I also sometimes stress about throwing the routine out the window to do something fun as a family (like all day trip to the zoo). I haven't found the balance between keeping him on a schedule (which he really does do better with) vs. tolerating a little out of sorts behavior when it's worth it for fun family time vs. not over-reacting when someone else doesn't follow the schedule and doesn't seem to understand the impact. Sigh...

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    1. That's a big one here too! We switch between mom, dad, nanny, my mom and my dad. My parents are really good about trying to stick to the "rules" but it's complicated. And I also worry if spontaneity is worth messing with a nap schedule that works! I try to do be as spontaneous as possible, but it's stressful!

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  4. My biggest worry right now? My daughter doesn't seem to like any purees we have given her so far. As my bm supply drops, I was hoping that she would eat more solid food instead of formula.

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    1. Dylan has never loved purées. Practicing actually chewing and eating with dissolvable foods like O's or Mum mums helped us. And D liked yogurt better than fruit purées...I feel you on this one!

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  5. Let's see....balanced meals since C hates most veggies. Keeping him safe without crowding him. And feeling incompetent when it comes to how to handle his tantrums.

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  6. Food, definitely. We finally got N off of purées at 17 months but now all he wants is spaghetti, animal crackers and Pinkberry with an occasional French fry. Veggies? No way.

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  7. Funny timing. I just emailed the I Like Beer and Babies blog all the ways I was a shitty parent on Tuesday of this week. The title of her post is actually All the Ways Abby Was a Shitty Parent Yesterday, bless her heart. After the post was a very kind PS from her at the end that was very supportive. Go read it if you are interested. Tuesday was a bad day. Plus her blog is funny and all her commenters are awesome.
    My biggest stressor is about working a lot of hours and feeling like I'm shortchanging my daughter. And I let her watch too much TV. And I don't make her eat enough food so she has been underweight her whole life (she's on the chart, but we haven't made it to the double digits for weight percentile and her height is well below 50%). And I haven't really pushed the potty training thing too hard even though she's almost 3 and all the kids in her toddler class are using the potty. And I don't do crafts with her, or bake with her, or planned theme parties for her birthdays, or basically do anything anyone would ever see on Pinterest. Oh, and sometimes I feel like washing dishes and folding laundry is a cool break from entertaining a 2 year old.

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  8. Food for sure. My almost 1 year old still doesn't like most foods and is still mostly formula. I feel like he is so behind when I see other babies eating SO much food. And someone mentioning that their one year old got one last bottle and that was it.

    Lately I'm also stressing with the fact that I can't so much as step out of the room that he's in for 5 seconds without him having a meltdown because I'm walking away from him. I know it's a phase, but I struggle to get things done when he's like this.

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  9. Ok, seriously SERIOUSLY hating Feedly for eating comments (WTF!!!!).

    Short version: raising both hands over here. All the things you talked about we have concerns with too. And, dammit, there should be no guilt about talking about this stuff.

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