I haven't been outside since September 21st!
It's going to be slightly harder to go see baby since I can't drive for a couple of weeks, but luckily, I have an extremely supportive family included a retired mom who will make sure I get to see him as often as possible.
But now if I want to take a nap (I'm exhausted), no one can walk in and interrupt me. It's weird that even though I don't have baby with me, I'm still pumping every 3 hours including at night so it still affects my sleep. I tried to nap in the hospital but it was impossible.
Now I'm on my own couch, with fresh air coming in through the open windows.
And then I'll go to the hospital with Mr. GG after dinner just like we do every other night. Ideally we would go before and after dinner...we'll have to work out a routine. Then I plan to go every morning also.
* * * * *
Baby can breathe on his own which is great, but because of his age, he has apnea. He either forgets to breathe or gets too tired to keep breathing. So he's on a ventilator to make sure that he breathes, but he is breathing regular air - the same as the rest of us.
Baby has a Level 2 (out of 4) brain bleed. This is extremely common and level 2 is not extremely worrisome. They will recheck on Thursday and we hope it has not progressed.
He had a blood transfusion today which is also going to be pretty common. Babies of his size have so little blood in their bodies and he can't keep up.
Otherwise, he's looking really good. His little fingers can squeeze my hand. Sometimes he squeezes a tube between his toes (he got his dad's toes...looong toes) : ). He also has his dad's ears and a full head of hair.
I feel happy when I see him, not sad because I think he's strong and can fight. But I do get sad frequently when I'm by myself. I'm sure some of it is hormones. It's hard leaving a hospital without your baby. But overall, I'm doing well, thanks in large part to the support of all of you (well 99% of you).
Just keep thinking those positive thoughts that baby will continue to thrive!
So glad to hear Baby GG is a fighter! =) Praying for all of you! I hope you can get some good rest at home in between visits to see your precious baby. =D
ReplyDeleteThis post made me smile - a gigantic smile!
ReplyDeleteI'm so happy for you! I can't imagine how hard it is, especially when you are alone with the little guy or without the little guy.
That’s awesome that you are pumping - how is that going?
Have they gave you a timeframe of about how long the little man will be in there for?
Any hints on the name you two picked out?
I'm super excited for you!!! And continuing to hold you ALL in my thoughts and prayers!
HUGS!
Before having my triplets I had been on hospital bedrest for 2 months. I actually begged them to keep me longer so i could stay in the same place my babies were being kept but they didn't let me. I started driving myself after a week and i was at the NICU for about 8-12 hours a day. I'm sure it will be difficult for you to stay away from him. Thank goodness my triplets has no major help issue like a brain bleed. You must be terrified. I will continue to pray for your baby boy. He has a long road ahead of him so I pray his NICU stay is uneventful.
ReplyDeleteThank you. They would have let me stay one more day, but the lack of sleep was affecting my time with him anyway, so I think I'll actually get to spend more time with him if I'm at home and I don't live far at all which is nice. They told me 2 weeks for driving, but I'm thinking 1 week too.
DeleteThar is such wonderful news baby is doing so well!! Sending positive thoughts your way!!
ReplyDeleteI can't imagine what you are going through. You are in my thoughts, as is your little bebe!
ReplyDeleteHope you enjoyed your first breath of fresh air and your first steps outside of the hospital corridor. Glad to hear that you and your boy are doing well!!! My heart melted away about his tiny fingers squeezing your hand...awhhhh.... :)
ReplyDeleteThis might be a very silly and unimportant question to ask at this point but I'm wondering have you guys chosen a name yet?
He has a name, I'm just not sure about posting it here. I'll think about it : ).
DeleteI have seen other people share names in a photo so that it is unsearchable and then take it down a day later, or write a riddle about it, not that you should do that if it in any way makes you feel uncomfortable. Just thought I would throw it out there.
DeleteI am just glad that he is ok.
I am so glad baby GG is fighting and that you are able to rest at last. I have been thinking about you all. With hugs
Definitely sending positive thoughts your and baby's way!
ReplyDeleteAs horrid as it is that Baby GG has to stay in hospital, it sounds like you have a positive attitude towards it and there are definitely positive signs! Keeping those positive thoughts coming your way!
ReplyDeleteSO glad to hear this update! Rest as much as you can and enjoy your precious little guy and your freedom!
ReplyDeleteSo glad to hear he is fighting and you are doing well. Sending love xox
ReplyDeleteHopefully he continues to fight and the brain bleed resolves on its own. My daughter was born 10 weeks early (one of two surviving triplets, her id sister died in utero a few days prior); she had a level 1 brain bleed that they told us was essentially nothing, but she now has cerebral palsy. Sorry if that's a downer, but I always like to know possibilities.
ReplyDeleteI like to know possibilities too...I hope your daughter is doing ok. One of the side-effects of the Magnesium that I was on is that it actually reduces Cerebral Palsy. Definitely no guarantees, but we'll see.
DeleteWow! I wish that I had checked the blog more consistently--so much has happened! I'm so sorry that you had to go through the whole freaky bleeding-and-bedrest scenario. That is so difficult, just hanging out and waiting. I was on bed rest for 11 weeks, 4 in the hospital, and it feels like Groundhog Day. 2 lbs is an awesome weight! They always do lost a little bit after they are born. That freaked me out when our guys were born at 33 weeks. One of my "change the world" wishes is that no one should have to experience the NICU (although one where you can stay with your baby overnight is *awesome*). It's such an unpredictable roller-coaster ride. And you hit the nail on the head when you said that it is hard to leave without your baby--but you know that your little guy is in the best place, getting the best care that he can have. And you are going to be there to love on him a lot. Kangaroo care is such a wonderful experience...those are good memories. Welcome to the world, Baby GG!! We will send you our love, and keep you all in our thoughts and prayers.
ReplyDeleteI have said the bedrest weeks were like Groundhog Day many times. It almost doesn't seem like it was nearly 3 weeks.
DeleteI'm glad you're home - recover well and take as many trips to see him as you can. I'm nosey and would love to know his name - but more importantly, I'll be sending him speedy growing wishes. x
ReplyDeleteGlad to hear baby is doing well. I will continue to keep you and baby in my thoughts and prayers. I love reading your updates :) You seem to be SO positive and I love that about your blog!
ReplyDeleteIt sure sounds like he is a fighter like his mama!
ReplyDeleteAll great news! :-)
ReplyDeletewill be praying for him!!! keep us updated with his positive changes :-)
ReplyDeleteI'm glad to see good updates. It must feel great to be home but bittersweet, with Baby GG still in the hospital. Do preemies still need to be at least five pounds to be able to be released? I remember that was the case a few years ago with a friends baby and she also had to pass some sort of car seat test.
ReplyDeleteHopefully now you can have a shower after all. My friend's shower was rescheduled as she was in the hospital when the original one was scheduled.
I guess as a mom to babies born at 25 weeks, this post worries me. First off, you just had a micro-preemie and the first part of this post is that you are finally free from the hospital? And that you can take a nap in peace? Most women in your position think constantly about how they wish they could have last just one more month, one more week or one more DAY on hospitalized bedrest. I was on home bedrest for 4 weeks and hospitalized for 3 more, and I have never been so sad than the day I was discharged from the hospital. I would have done ANYTHING to keep my babies in a little longer. Never, EVER did it cross my mind that I was finally out of the hospital and could nap in peace.
ReplyDeleteAnd, to reiterate a bit what Amy said, a grade II brain bleed IS worrisome. If your NICU staff is telling you that a level II brain bleed isn't worrisome, they are lying to you. Is it common? Yes, absolutely. But is it worrisome? YES.
I feel like you don't exactly know what you are in for. My 25 weekers almost died several times, and even now that we are all home, we are no where near close to being "normal".
Either you are just being incredibly guarded and not putting all of the information out there, or you truly don't know what is in store and what hurdles your son still faces.
I would have loved to stay longer if he was still inside of me, but after the birth, I am glad to be home (which is what I wrote).
DeleteI am worried about the brain bleed, believe me! But I choose to look on the bright side. The doctors in my NICU do not sugar coat anything. He specifically said that this is common and if it does not progress, right now, it's not causing damage. We get another ultrasound tomorrow and we will see.
Regarding your last point, I am very well-informed. I stay sane, by being happy about the positives of the day, but not worrying too much about the future, since I can't control it and I don't know exactly what it will be. Then when something happens, which I know something will, I will deal with it when I have that information. I don't think any of this will be easy...
Let's not jump to conclusions. Are YOU a doctor? This happens a lot. The folks in the NICU are highly trained...let them tell GG what is worrisome and what isn't.
DeleteIs GG really supposed to just sit there 24/7 after having gone thru all that she has? She's got to heal too...it's not your place to suggest how she should feel. I am thrilled she's out of the hospital, getting sleep & there for baby GG. She needs normal, this pregnancy has been anything but.
Her pregnancy was anything but normal because she chose to transfer more than 1 embryo knowing that she would kill her babies if she got pregnant with more than one. Very irresponsible and selfish.
DeleteI said I wouldn't post factually inaccurate comments, but I think this one is important to respond to so that everyone is clear (even though I have said so before).
DeleteMy husband and I were fully prepared for a twin pregnancy. We were told the twin rates were about 33% when transferring 2 embryos. The risk of higher order multiples was either glossed over or we did not understand it (or thought it was so small that it was not a determining factor). We have seen more and more evidence that embryos split more often than we were informed about and will definitely be talking to our RE about it after everything has calmed down.
If we had it to do over again, we would only have transferred 1 embryo. But if we had ended up with twins, not quads then triplets, we would not have reduced the pregnancy.
Thinking of your family. Hoping that everyday passes brings strides :)
ReplyDeleteYay for being out of the hospital! It must feel like heaven to be in your own bed. Baby boy sounds so strong and I'm so glad to hear he's doing well.
ReplyDeleteHey, stopping by again. Did the doctors ever say what caused all this? Was it baby GG placental issues? If you have the desire to post this, I would be interested to hear.
ReplyDeleteAgain, y'all are in my thoughts!
Just wanted to offer my support! Hugs & T&P's to baby boy to keep growing and getting stronger :)
ReplyDeleteMillions and billions of positive thoughts for BabyGG headed your way!!!
ReplyDeleteMy daughter, who was nine days OVERDUE, spent time in the NICU too. It was hard, so hard but I know she was in the best place for her during her stay. Your sweet boy sounds amazingly strong and your positive attitude will go a long way for both you and him. Remember to take care of yourself as much as you take care of him.
ReplyDeleteBest of luck to you.
Oh I'm so glad you posted! And that baby is doing well. You both have been on my mind and I just hoped that all was stable. Keep us updated!
ReplyDeleteMissC
Oh long toes! And breathing! I hope we get to see some pics!
ReplyDeleteTake care - you guys all need a mama bear's strength. You're doing great!
My baby was born 18 years ago - with a serious brain problem that later required surgery and spent her early life in the NICU too. I know only too well the stress and worry when your baby has a problem and you wish it was not so. I cannot make any promises for you, of course no-one can. The doctors were very realistic, at times too realistic of the potential issues in her future. She too had a brain bleed, a quite serious one.
ReplyDeleteI can only speak from my experience, her health issues made her a mature, sensible, thoughtful and compassionate young woman and I'm currently in a very mixed place, missing her but incredibly proud she just left home to go to University after excellent exam results. Enjoy every moment with your lovely son, he will grow up so very fast. Congratulations and try not to worry, things really do work out.